Artemis Tells All
by bats-randomness
Summary: Artemis talks with a news reporter and explains her team. But when Young Justice shows up they end up acting the exact opposite of what Artemis said. It has to be some weird dream. It's complicated just read and enjoy! Humor.


So I did this shot story for fun, the real reason for this will be reveled at the end of the story. Enjoy, hope it makes you smile!

Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice._. But I do own Stan and Leslie the reporters!

Artemis Tells All.

[Mt. Justice in living room]

"So tell us Artemis, who are you and what is 'Young Justice'?" a man reporter, which looked around 26, spoke with her. To her knowledge his name was Stan, and he was here with his assistant Leslie.

Artemis smirked, "I'll save the best for last. As for my team I'll be glad to tell. The team consists of six members; Aqualad, Superboy, Kid Flash, Miss Martian, Robin and myself. "

"Interesting. I'm going to guess who everyone's Mentor is but the main reason we came for an interview is for you to tell us about each member. We've been trying for months to get an interview but no avail from the young heroes." Stan spoke sounding a little frustrated, Leslie nodded in agreement.

"Mmhhm, that's what I thought. So who do you want me to spill first?" Artemis spoke eagerly .

"If your friends didn't want you to tell us about themselves why did you step up to speak the media?" Leslie asked curiously.

"Shush Leslie it doesn't matter the important thing is that she's speaking with us." Stan muttered to her.

"Oh it okay, I have my reasons." Artemis answered overhearing them.

"On with the interview, tell us about… um Leslie." Stan turned to his assistant for help; apparently he didn't know the teen's names even though Artemis had just told him. Leslie rolled her eyes, and said "Aqualad."without even looking down at her notepad.

"Right. So what's he like? We don't want to know their powers that's boring we are from a company who like to write about people and what they're like." Stan tried to regain his professional composure.

She shrugged "If you ask me he's kind of the boring oh so wise type. Maybe that's why he's leader, I wasn't on the team when they chose leader but whatever he seems like the right type, all calm in the worst situations you know? He's also brave and kind, very patient. Nice guy. He won't get into fight unless he has to."

Leslie and Stan wrote notes furiously on paper, "Uh-huh Tell us his age and what is the one word you would use to describe him?" Stan asked not looking up at her.

"Um, he told me his age once…um oh right he's 17. And one word to describe him, that's easy it would be **polite**." Artemis said not giving it much thought.

"Any other comments you would like to add?" Leslie asked her sweetly.

"Besides that he's Aquaman's side kick, and that it is almost impossible to get him mad nothing much." Artemis answered stroking her ponytail.

"So he's like the peace-maker of your group?" she asked.

"I guess he is, whose next?" the girl archer answered already bored.

"Superboy." Stan said reading the list, Leslie gasped. "Superboy is he like Superman's son?" the brunette asked shocked.

Stan scoffed "Don't be silly Leslie, see this is why your just an assistant."

Leslie and Artemis both sent him bone chilling glares. "Why as a matter of fact he is, but I cannot say anymore but that. I'll talk more about Superboy what do you want to know, Leslie?" Artemis asked cockyily ignoring Stan.

"His personality as well." The Twenty-two year old young lady told her.

"Um okay, he's a little tougher to crack, ooh he's moody. Like sometimes he'll just be really angry or sometimes he'll just laugh at a joke or something and you're like whoa did he just laugh? But he's nice too, if you don't mess with his stuff. I think he has trust issues, with him it's hard to tell because he usually keeps his comments to himself unless he gets offended. He aslo likes feeling strong, hates being weak, a random fact he hates monkeys. God I'm rambling non-stop like..." Artemis quickly put a hand over her mouth to shut herself up she was about to say Wally; she's never been so open.

"No, no you're doing great! All this is really good for the article we're writing. Rambling is fantastic." Stan was practically begging her to continue.

"I don't know if I should." Artey said suddenly unsure and shy.

"Think of it like this, it's not you we're talking about it's your friends." Leslie tried to make her look at it from a different perspective. For whatever reason, it worked.

"Fine, he was 16 weeks but, now he's just 16 years-old don't ask it's complicated. And one word I would describe him as besides hot it would be **different**. Yup different, he has his own path to choose, his own choices to make, he's still trying to find his place in the world. Talking about different he has two pets, Sphere and Wolf. Sphere is a giant alien metal sphere, it's a girl. And wolf is literally a white wolf; he won't come if you call him cuz he only responds to Superboy." She spoke surprising herself, _Where did that come from? I'm not even close to the clone weird! Artemis thought creped out._

Leslie stared at her in Awe, she seemed to know what she was doing. "Next is Kid Flash."

"It's my job to say that." Stan selfishly spoke through gritted teeth.

"Kid Dork, Kid Mouth, Kid Jerk, Kid Dumbass, Flash Jr. oh the list goes on and on, do we have to talk about him?" Artemis complained.

"Yes, I'm guessing he's not your favorite person?" the brunette asked rhetorically smoothing out her skirt.

"Okay where do I start…. He's immature no doubt. He and robin are always playing some sort of game or prank annoying all of us. Then when Miss M. bakes something he always has to eat it! Like excuse you we want cookies too. And he has to flirt with every female he sees like it's soo annoying. Also for being the fastest kid on the world, he's so slow sometimes. Not only does he arrive late for important meetings but when they explain things he doesn't get it even when it's the obvious." She stopped to take a breath.

"And he can't shut up either, he ends up saying the stupidest things and I can't help but hit him on the back of his head. He's a science guy too, into all that chemical stuff. I so don't see him as a scientist he'd be too clumsy for that. What else…" Artemis said begging to tap her chin thinking if she left anything out. "Hmm he loves excitement, when he gets bored he tries to find ways to freshen up life even when we don't ask him to." she added content with her answer.

"Wow, sounds like this guys is a major jerk." Leslie says not starting to like this guy without even knowing him.

"No, KF's sweet in his own way. And besides he is pretty cute with those eyes of his." Artemis spoke dreamingly. She blushed a deep crimson _she didn't not just say that out loud! She did! She did! Fuck! _

"I mean rude, yeah that's what I meant he's rude! He's so rude with those eyes of his always ogling your body disgusting! As for your next question he's 15 like me. One word to describe him would be **energetic**. Next?" she covered quickly not wanting to say another word about Wally_. So she might have had a small crush on him but they didn't need to know that._

"Next would be Miss Martian." Stan was so dense, while Leslie smiled and chose to not say anything.

"Miss M? She's chill. Sweet girl, bakes us cookies. Being new to earth and all she's naïve. But she can hold her own in battle, too. People think she's just an ordinary innocent but they won't stand a chance against this shape-shifter from Mars. She's a strong telepath, rumor around here is that she's got a stronger mind than her uncle, Martian Manhunter. Sometimes that's good because she can last longer in battle but when she can't control it, it gets bad." Artemis spilled some of Megan secrets. For some reason she didn't think her team would get mad at her.

"What else? She's kind of the preppy kind, but still unsure of herself. She lacks the confidence within her, and she watches out for every member. Making sure to ask what's wrong when someone feels down. I've been recently told she's going out with Superboy, no comment on that subject. She's 16 in earth years don't know about Mars. One word to describe her is **caring.**" Artemis ended her statement bluntly.

"That leaves the boy wonder. This outta be good." Stan said clasping his hand together. Leslie too was enjoying this, she had to love her job right now, even if most of the time she felt like stupid Stan's slave.

"Boy blunder? He's the youngest and most mischievous. There's not a lot I know about him. He's an excellent hacker, and Batman only takes the best so he's really amazing fighter for his age. He's been at this hero gig for 4 years now; he started when he was nine he told me. He's addicted to video games no surprise there. Of course he acts immature most of the time, he's still young. He cracks jokes, and plays pranks, disobeys rules just for fun. Like's to show off every now and them, sometimes he's a little too cocky, an over dose on confidence. He always wears that ridiculous grin on his face, and his signature cackle sends shivers down your spine. We like to describe him as a ninja, always in the shadows, loves to sneak up on us. Not nearly annoying as KF but close enough." She stoped to reflect on what she said, so far so good.

"He's 13, one word to describe him would be **mysterious.** As talkative as he is, he won't let us in on what his civilian side is. So it's like we only know a piece of him, that's why he's mysterious." She finished.

"We learned so much in so little time, this was spectacular! Now for the grand finale… tell ius about yourself Artemis." The Stan spoke raising his voice with excitement, his hazel eyes lighting up.

"Oh didn't think about that… well… okay I'm not much of a girly girl. I'm an archer, and…" Artemis was cut off as the teleporters announced Kaldur's and a guest's arrivals.

_Uh-oh! I thought only I was going to be the only one here today! I'm dead so very dead! _"Quick you guys need to hide! He can't know that you're here! Hide in that closet." Artemis whispered frantically as she pushed them into a supply closet, _since when do we have a supply closet in the living room?_

She heard Kaldur and another voice chuckling as they entered the living room.

"So Aqualad I've been meaning to ask, you being my best friend in all it would really mean a lot to me if…" the boy with black hair started. Artemis stared at them, they didn't seem to noticed her.

"Yes, what is it Garth?" Kaldur asked politely.

"If you could be my best man at my wedding? With Tula. What do you say?" Garth asked hopefully.

Kaldur's eye twitched, he remained silent.

"Well?" Garth asked nervously.

"What do I say? What do I say?" Kaldur seemed amused, which put Garth in a good mood.

"I say… HOW COULD YOU! YOU BASTARD! SHE WAS MINE! YOU STOLE HER FROM ME! WHAT KIND OF BEST FRIEND DOES THAT!" the friendly atlantean yelled losing his temper.

"I-I-I…" Garth stammered.

"YOU WHAT? YOU KNEW I LOVED HER ALL MY LIFE BECAUSE OF YOU SHE DUMPED ME! THANKS YOUR'RE A REAL PAL." Kaldur yelled lunging at him, Garth was too scared to move as Aqualad tackled him to the ground.

"THEN YOU GO AND MARRY HER WHEN YOU KNOW I STILL LOVE HER!" he began to choke Garth. All Garth did was gasp for air.

Never in a million years would Artemis think she would be the one to break up a fight between Kaldur and a friend. She shrugged it off, first time for everything. "Break it up! Let the guy breathe Kal! Calm down! Killing him won't make it better!" she tried pulling Kaldur off of him.

"Yes it will! If he's dead Tula will have no choice but to date me!" he yelled blind with envy.

"So much for **Peacemaker**, mark him down as **Violent**, Leslie." Stan directed his assistant, she grimly agreed.

Everyone in the room heard Stan, they all froze. Artemis slapped Kaldur, "Get a grip on reality!"

"My word Garth! My deepest apologizes." Kaldur humbly apologized, then while helping him up; he whispered in his ear. "This isn't over. You will not marry her." Which made Garth gulp.

The teleporters announced the arrival of Superboy and Kid Flash. Both weren't themselves.

For one thing Conner was laughing madly, acting all mellow. "Hehe, look look it's it's Artey! And TV!"

"Yes, correct. Now do us a favor go and lie down." Wally as Kid Flash told him sounding stressed.

"My hand! It has fingers." Conner said observing his hands in front of his face. They all turned to KF for an explanation.

"He got into some special brownies." Wally explained with a sigh. Artemis began to laugh, but stopped when no one else joined in.

"Scratch out **Different **and replace it with **Drug Addict.**" Leslie whispered to Stan, he nodded.

"Well why don't you find this hilarious?" she questioned KF.

"I've been having a bad day. Even this can't amuse me." KF said dully. Again never in a million years would she think he would hear KF say that, nothing prepared her for what she did next.

"What happened?" she asked quietly looking at him worried.

Instead of him snorting out his usual 'Why do you care' argument he told her with a sigh. "When you accidently flirt with your Aunt, and she slaps you. It makes you never want to disrespect a lady ever again. This might be the day I mature." He whispered sadly. Artemis gasped.

"Replace **Energetic **with **Dull Mature**." Stan said shaking his head in disapproval. "I'll put in **Respectful** as well." added Leslie.

Then to Artemis's horror, the teleporters announced Miss Martian's and Robin's arrival.

"Uh-huh then she has the nerve to call me selfish! Yup, I know right, she's such a bitch." Miss Martian said floating into the room talking on her pink cellphone.

Robin walked into the room slouching, with his trade mark smirk missing replaced with a frown.

"Miss M. do you think you could…?" Robin started in a cracked voice.

"Excuse you, do you not see me on the phone? Don't interrupt." She shushed him, "Oh sorry that was just a nobody. Oh I can totally go to the movies on Friday! You're paying right?" she replied on her phone floating away.

To say Artemis was shocked, would be a misunderstanding to say she was flabbergasted now that would explain her current situation.

"Mmm-hhmm I'm already replacing **Caring **with the word **Snobby**." Leslie spoke before Stan could say anything.

"Robin, forget Miss M. what's wrong?" Artemis asked as nice as she could.

"Just gona ask if she had seen my depression pills." He said his voice sounding a little normal.

"You take depression pills!" she yelled astonished.

"Um yeah, you didn't really think I could be that happy all the time did ya?" Robin asked still depressed.

"You, you admitted it! You never admit stuff … all this is it's a nightmare!" she screamed at her team backing away.

"Robin went from **mysterious **to **depressed.**" Stan scribbled it down on his paper.

Artemis can already see the headlines for tomorrows paper 'Worst Hero Team Ever' she began to imagen the article. She couldn't believe it, too much information to take in, she fainted.

Violent, Drug Addict, Snobby, Dull, Depressing those thoughts ran through Artemis's mind as she woke with a startle.

She looked around, it was dark, and cold. _Where am I?_

She heard a soft snore near her, making her jump.

"Artemis you awake?" she heard Robin's voice ask groggily.

"Where am I? Where are you? What are we doing?" she asked nonstop.

"Don't you remember? Camping? Story spilling secrets? You fell asleep during Kaldur's turn" He answered sounding more awake. "We're sleeping under the stars, in sleeping bags." he clarified.

She looked around, her eyes adjusting to the dark. Sure enough all her team mates where all around her sleeping in sleeping bags. "It was only a dream!" she nearly shouted.

"Shh. Everyone's sleeping it's like 4 a.m. in the morning." He reminded her.

She stood up and walked over to him, she crouched down to his level. "Megan's not a snob? Kaldur's not a murderer?" she asked.

He looked at her confused, "Uh no."

"Conner's not a addicted to drugs? Wally is not mature?" she made sure.

"I sure hope not. Supes on drugs? Haha can you imagine? And a mature Wally, that'd be boring." He said with a grin.

"And you don't take depression pills?" she asked hopefully.

"Nope. Jeez Artey what kind of dream did you have? Sounds hilarious." The little bird joked.

She hugged him, surprising him. "Thank God it was only a horrible night mare!"

"Yeah butt why are you hugging me?" he asked uncomfortable, he gives hugs not receives them, especially not from cranky archers.

"Shut up you're the only one awake, and I needed that hug. Plus you're the littlest you shouldn't care. Tell anyone you'll die." She said simply, stopping the boy's questions.

_I'd never change my team, my new family, for anything in the world. _

**A/N: Yeah Artey was och-ish but hey it was for my own amusement. **


End file.
